so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
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Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
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I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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