are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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