is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize