oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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