I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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