I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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