oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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