there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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