The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize