i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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