So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize