she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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