I am full of burrito and curiosity
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize