Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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