My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize