Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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