At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Randomize