just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
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Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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