Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
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