I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
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She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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