I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize