He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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