Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize