God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize