I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
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This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
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