Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
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then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize