i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize