So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize