we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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