It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize