is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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