Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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