Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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