when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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