opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize