He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize