yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
false alarm, still single
Randomize