watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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