Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
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