Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize