I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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