Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Still dying that you shit outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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