you turned your livingroom into a bong?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i wish my penis had a tongue
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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