Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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