he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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