I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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