I wish i was in the wii world.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
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