Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize