this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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