I just pynch a tree in the face
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize